Saints Row: The Third - Review

Since 2006, “Saints Row” has been gang-banging its way out of the shadow of its fellow third-person shooting, open world, gun-toting, car-stealing extravaganza, “Grand Theft Auto”. With this third installment to the series, Saints is looking to expand that gap far beyond what many would have ever believed. Though gigantic purple dildos played a major role in the advertising campaign of the game, that isn’t the only ‘gap enlargement’ tool at play here.

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Saints Row: The Third
Xbox 360, Playstation 3, PC
Single Player, Co-Op
Developer: Volition, inc.
Publisher: THQ
ESRB Rating: M for Mature
Price: $59.99

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Right off the bat, Saints Row: The Third’s over-the-top action hits the stage with an epic bank-breaking and mid-air battle prologue, setting the tone for much more extreme gameplay elements to take place down the line. You return as whatever (unnamed) custom boss of the 3rd Street Saints you decided to craft or download from the game’s in-depth initiation station, male or female.

The game’s story is fun. It is your duty as the boss of the Saints to recapture your gang’s clout in the city of Steelport by buying up property and beating out other gangs through violence or challenges, which wind up being violent, anyway. The Saint’s gang members’ working relationships come off as believable and genuine, greatly in part due to the quality voice performances of the game’s cast. The plot is full of twists and turns, with hard-hitting ‘holy shit’ moments aplenty. An aspect that makes the game’s narrative work so well is the dialogue and voice acting of each individual character as you progress through the game. There are also ‘choose your own adventure’ elements that provide a tinge of welcomed replay value. That factor plays a major and minor role when it comes to the game’s ending. Major because the choice you make forever changes the face of aspects of the city; minor because you have the choice to go back and get the alternate ending. One is indeed more satisfying than the other.

Saints Row: The Third plays near to the style of an arcade adventure. The default shooting configuration may be a bit sluggish for those more experienced, quick-to-react gamers. Head shots and nut shots being the key to stopping an assailant cold is very gratifying. The driving is fairly far from a simulation experience. Things like power-sliding can be pulled off without a hitch once you understand the simple control of the driving mechanics. Yes, some vehicles do feel heavier than others, but you will only have to adjust slightly to get used to each particular set of wheels. The game’s assorted flying contraptions control much closer in style within their vehicular grouping. There are also boats in the game…but they don’t matter when it comes to the grand scheme of things.
Rounding off the SR3’s base story are an assortment of mini-games that must be played in order to obtain 100% of sections of Steelport. These, and the three tiers of difficulty of each challenge, keeps things from becoming too repetitive when it comes to progressing through the campaign.

Combat, health, weapon, and car upgrades will make your adventure in Steelport easier as you go. The gun pickings have their typical pistol, SMG, and rifle selections; however, it is the other special gun options that make SR3 outstanding as a third person action game. Car modification is possibly the most gratifying and addictive hobby in SR3. With the customization options of each individual ride, you may want 2 or 3 of a kind in your garage, as if you are preparing for your own personal ‘tricked-out-whip’ convention.

There is nothing graphically groundbreaking about SR3. That’s not saying it isn’t a pretty game, though. The colorful Steelport environment holds up fairly well, considering there is no apparent loading time during travel from one section of the city to another. The loading doesn’t really come into play until you change instances or die. With the graphics engine does come a load of glitches that may be encountered during your exploration sessions; mostly getting stuck in walls.

All in all, Saints Row: The Third is a fun game, once you get past the fact that most of the NPC’s in the game drive as if they have Tourette’s syndrome. The level of customization is notable. Custom fashion, custom gang, custom cars, and low speed rickshaw chases make SR3 more of a unique experience than a mindless slaughter fest GTA clone. It’s over the top action will excite most crowds, causing a lot of “Oohs” and “Oh Damn’s!”. Despite all the story has to offer, SR3 is short, if you choose to go simply from one in-game mission to another. If you do choose to go for 100% completion, you could easily squeeze 40 hours of gameplay out of this one, not including Whored mode. THQ has yet to announce what the DLC content will be, but after playing through the game’s story completely, there is a chance a good portion of it will be story based.

The LV. Cap: Marvel vs. Capcom 3 Review

How many times can two universes successfully collide before a black hole appears, sucking them into an infinite oblivion? After 10 high combo years, Capcom has finally released the next installment of their amalgamated series, Marvel vs. Capcom.


Marvel Vs. Capcom 3: Fate Of Two Worlds boasts a whopping mix of 35 playable characters from the Capcom and Marvel Comics universes’ right out of the gate. On top of that, there are two initial DLC characters Shuma-Gorath and Jill Valentine, for those who purchase the collector’s edition of the game. Surely, we will see more in the future. It is arguable to say that any character Capcom would have chosen to represent their universe could be considered obscure, but from the Marvel end of things it could be said some of the character choices are indeed bizarre and esoteric, to say the least. An arguable point can be made that any character representing Capcom could be considered obscure, but on the Marvel end of things, some of the character choices cross obscure and go into the bizarre and esoteric.


“Who the hell is Taskmaster”? Is a common question spewed from the lips of those who aren’t deep into Marvel comics; and “What the F*$% is a M.O.D.O.K”? soon follows. Some fan favorite’s return, while new wonders grace the beautiful stages of MvC3. With so many choices, a fair curiosity could come about balance… MvC3 is unbalanced, maybe more so than Blazblue. Where some characters do a ton of damage, while others have an incalculable amount of hit points, some characters don’t do nearly enough [damage], and can be knocked out of a match after a single devastating combo. This may cause great frustration for those who are not “in the know”, while providing an ego of those who are without honor, choosing the biggest damage dealing hit point monster available.


Three installments of Marvel vs. Capcom, and with each one debut a new button configuration. MvC3 returns to the six button layout where MvC2 had four. With four attack buttons, one of them being launch, and 2 assist buttons, MvC3 has found its comfort zone. Once a player captures the gist of the buttons, the road to epic combo city awaits, even moreso after a visit to the training and mission modes. Both these modes help you master the timing of assists and which button sequences work best for your favorite team of characters.


Though nothing but player vs. player experience could truly prepare you for online battles, arcade mode could be considered the next best tutor. In arcade mode, players progress through six life or death battles, before coming face to face with the world eater Galactus; a rage inducing coward of a boss with no skill to speak of, he is composed of mere cheese and overpower.  After beating arcade mode, gamers are treated to a comic story of the character who delivered the final blow, saving the world. Though the can be quite amusing, they just don’t feel grand enough to make the single player experience feel worth it.


With limpid intent, MvC3 is meant to be an arcade experience brought home. If the year was anytime before 1996, this game would be the hit attraction at your local quartering hole, surrounded by cheering onlookers and aggressive competitive types, waiting to show their prowess on the sticks. What we have today are impersonal online lobbies which can hold up to eight players, taking turns to have a go at each others super powered throats.



As the game is played and a series of challenges are executed, players unlock icons titles, and galleries. Icons and titles can be applied to a players profile for the world to see. A cool feature to prepare players to venture out in to the fighting internets lies in training mode, Capcom has added a lag feature. Players can adjust the connection bar, to virtually experience what it would be like if they attempt to perform their favorite combos against players using netzero, downloading porn, tormenting, or decide to stress their 56k connection to its limits.


Marvel Vs. Capcom 3 is beautiful. Every character is done great graphic justice, with each character having four seemingly well thought out color palettes. Smooth animation and sweet moves bring our nerdiest fantasies to life. The stages on which players fight are steeped in astounding detailed visuals that may easily distract those with attention deficit disorder. Marvel Vs. Capcom is awesome, but it is not perfect. Bigger rewards for the single player experience would have been a much welcomed addition, as this is a console game in a console generation; and the consideration of a fix for the balance issue is in order. MvC3 successfully brings the arcade feel to your home TV set, and we can be sure to see cooler additions and characters added as DLC in the future. Capcom has managed to live to the hype, which is a hard task in this day and age. Everything the fighter’s generation looked forward to lie there for the conquering. Nothing came as a surprise, what we saw and got our blood burning is there, which leaves things in a perfect limbo. Where are the pleasant blindsiding surprises?

The LV. Cap: LIMBO

“How low can you go?” is usually a question that comes to mind when the word “limbo” is brought to someone’s attention. Sweet Caribbean rhythms are played as ungraceful cocktail sipping vacationers attempt to contort their way under bamboo poles. Fun is had by all… this is not that limbo. This Limbo is dark and gloomy. It is neither heaven nor hell; it just is, as limbo is supposed to be.

Playdead Studio’s Limbo is made of the mind numbing challenges and puzzles of the games from the systems of the good ol’ days: The 90’s. The days when people threw their controllers at the TV in frustration of their own limits while taking on a challenge. Not because of the developers desire to implement challenges that can only be won over by repetition and sheer luck.

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Limbo
Xbox Live Arcade
1 Player
Developer: Playdead Games
Publisher: Xbox Live Arcade
ESRB Rating: T For Teen
Price: 1200 Microsoft Points

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Simple graphics accompanied by simple controls is the way this one plays. The story, or a lack there of, follows a boy who wakes up in the grasses of what seems to be purgatory. He has somewhere or someone he is trying to get to, and while getting there he is subjected to a series of odd hazard ridden encounters and trials. The depth of any chance of a story stops there. Though you may wish there were more to it, you may find it doesn’t really matter, nor do you remember to care. The many different silhouetted environments are exceptionally entrancing, though they are completely naked of texture. Each habitat stands out as a deep layered modest work of art.

Missing is an endearing composed soundtrack to match the ambiance of the universe. That factor alone will keep most players from being completely enamored by the game. With the world of Limbo being so noir in nature it wouldn’t have needed too much in the form of musical accompaniment.  Imagine Danny Elfman given nothing to work with but a xylophone and some soft pencil erasers; that would have been enough.


The first play though of Limbo is difficult enough to induce a conniption. You will die a thousand deaths, it is inevitable.  It is advised you keep all individuals you dislike, blunt and heavy objects, or sharp objects out of immediate reach.  Some of the simplest of puzzles will arouse immeasurable rage in those less patient individuals, but completion of challenges gives you a rewarding feeling. You will often find yourself releasing “Oooh’s!” and “I get it’s!”, as if you had just solved a perplexing problem in math class, when overcoming some of the more difficult problems.

Ultimately Limbo leaves you just there; in limbo. The entire time playing you may not be sure if you love it or hate it, it just dangles somewhere in the middle (Giggity). Limbo manages to hold a sense of intriguing adventure on a shallow ground of personality and simplistic beauty. You may find it hard to put down the controller as you will come to many points where you just have to best a puzzle whose only existence is to mock you, or so it will seem at times. Its smooth animation and art school gray scale style is never too much. If the Playstation classics Oddworld, Abe’s Odyssey, and Ico were to have a mute Xbox Live Arcade child, Limbo would be it. Surely this is a first of many from Playdead Games. In the end it is reasonable to say they are off to a good start, on the positive side of Purgatory.

Nerd Rage: MGS Goes To 360. Who Wins?

By Roger Gaw

I’m going to give the answer right off the bat. Not the consumer. No my friends the All-Mighty Dollar wins again. It’s no secret that I can be considered a Sony fanboy at times but hear me out on this one. Because I will show you why that making MGS multi-platform is going to hurt the franchise. And Hideo Kojima broke my heart today because I thought he was above selling out.

First let’s look back in what in my opinion is the greatest and most epic story ever told in a video game. Metal Gear Solid 4. To this day I have yet to see a game with a better graphical presentation. A colleague of mine said that Killzone 2 had better graphics and I told him nay because I own both games and he doesn’t even own a Playstation 3 therefore having played neither one. Also let’s look at the length and content of the game. MGS4 took up an entire blu-ray disc. Not a single layer blu ray. Oh no, a 50 GB dual layer blu ray disc. If you were to port that to the Xbox 360, it would require 6 dual layered DVD discs. Changing out 6 discs is kind of a hassle to me. But again that’s just me. Not to mention the fact lets face it the Xbox 360 does not at this time have the raw power to pump out the graphics that MGS4 requires. So a game that is one year old has yet to be surpassed in graphical representation and content. It looks to me like Metal Gear Solid 4 set the bar pretty high for its successor.


Okay so let’s look at an argument posed to me by another friend. I can’t quote him exactly but his words were to the effect of when a game is multi-platform it tends to look better on the Xbox 360. Okay let’s just say he’s right. There must be a reason for that. I mean with the Playstation 3 being so much more powerful than the Xbox 360 how can this be? The answer is because when you develop a game for multi-platforms you have to make sure it works on the lesser of the two platforms and then port it to the more powerful one. It’s as simple as that. You can’t make a game that almost breaks the PS3 and then port it to Xbox 360 it wouldn’t work. Killzone 2 pushed my PS3 hard in terms of processing. The Cell Engine had a hard time keeping up with it. Now if the Cell had problems what do you think the Xbox processor would have done? PS3 exclusives look better than any multi-platform or Xbox 360 exclusives. You can’t argue with me on that. If a developer designs a game for the PS3 alone he has more power at his/her finger tips than they can handle.


On to the much anticipated Metal Gear: Rising. We’ve already pointed out that this game has a monumental legacy to follow(MGS4). How can they surpass their predecessor while having to, pardon the crude language please, but dumb down the game to something the 360 can handle and then port it to the PS3. And we all know how well ports work. The 360 version will probably look better because that’s what they have to design it for first. And what about length and content? Am I really going to have a 6 disc Xbox game? I doubt it. They will probably compress it to fit on 2 discs at the most. That’s still a third of what MGS4 had. At least they had the common f**king decency not to put a 5 behind Metal Gear Solid. Because in my opinion the Metal Gear Solid story ended. Big Boss and Solid Snake are dead. That’s what Metal Gear Solid is. To hell with this Raiden crap he was a pussy in Metal Gear Solid 2. And cyborg ninja or not I would take Big Boss or Solid Snake any day in a fight with him. So no Metal Gear: Rising is going to pale in comparison to its predecessor.


No my friends you have seen the last great Metal Gear game and it was Metal Gear Solid 4. And it was all for the money. Hideo Kojima is rich beyond our wildest dreams  but it wasn’t enough. A friend of mine said that if given the choice between making a beautiful game aka best product possible or making a lot of money he said that he would take the money. And that’s exactly what Hideo Kojima did. He didn’t need the money. But he did it because the industry I love so much is now driven by greed and the bottom dollar and it makes me sick. I was so sickened when I thought about the concessions that the next Metal Gear will have to make to work on the Xbox I was tempted to drive to Game Crazy and sell the motherf***er.


I am now jaded beyond your imagination because the one man whom I thought would never sell out sold out. Money is now the prime focus of the video game industry. No longer is it let’s put the best product possible in the hands of our consumers. It’s how much  money can we make? So there you have it. The All-Mighty Dollar wins because you will not get the best game that Hideo Kojima can produce. And that is sad because after devoting my existence to this franchise because of its continuance to deliver I am left betrayed for money. I’m just shocked that I’m the only who sees this Sony fanboy or not.


These are my views and they do not represent Nerdiest Kids. This is 100% an opinion column.

Nerd Rage: PS3 is better than Xbox 360. The truth hurts.

By Roger Gaw

Before I begin I want to state that this is solely my opinion. It in no way represents the stance of Nerdiest-Kids. Now on to the article.

Let us look at the obvious reasons first shall we? The raw brute power of the PS3 dwarfs that of the Xbox 360. That’s just the common undeniable truth. Now we can move on to the Blu-ray. While Xbox 360 still uses the standard DVD disc, Sony took a look into the future and developed the Blu-ray. The Blu-ray can hold 6 times as much information as a standard DVD. So when all you 360 owners are swapping your discs when you play Final Fantasy XIII just remember that the last time I had to disc swap was for the original Metal Gear Solid about ten years ago. Let’s not even talk about HD-DVD. That failed harder than laser disc.

And now to address the my favorite argument of the 360 fanboys. I’m not a PS3 fanboy by the way, I just call a spade a spade. “The PS3 has no games.” Wow. To be fair it is true that the 360 has a larger library of games than the PS3 because it did come out first. But nobody plays those games anymore ladies and gentlemen. People are playing games that are coming out TODAY! People aren’t playing Xbox games that came out in 2005. They are playing games that came out within the last year or so. And games that came out in the last year or so ARE AVAILABLE FOR BOTH CONSOLES! And don’t give me that exclusive crap. Exclusives are few and far between and the PS3 has just as many or more than the 360. So you can not argue with me that the 360 has better games because most games are multi-platform.

One of the main reasons I’m writing this article is that I’m just sick of people hating Sony for building a great machine. People say it costs too much. But you have to look at what it costs to make the said machine. They are loosing tons of money selling it at $400.00.
And another reason I think people hate it is because Sony completely dominated the last two console wars Nobody could touch PS1 and PS2. And Americans by their very nature want the underdog aka 360 to win. That’s why people rooted for the Giants to beat the Patriots. People hate winners. It’s a fact. On a side note I really do hate the Patriots. Those cheating bastards.

Again I’m not a fanboy. I own both consoles and I just want to give the Devil his due. Sony made a better console. Period. There is some irony to this article though. I’m writing while I’m talking in an Xbox Live party. Because unfortunately that’s all my friends have are Xbox.

So as I say when people hate on me. Don’t hate the player. Hate the fame.

Roger Gaw