Pitch This: X-Men Part 2- Academy X

Previously, Josh and I discussed at length what we saw wrong with Marvel Universes’s X-franchise. I won’t go into repeating what he had said, but I will focus on one specific thing. The need of a school. The X-Men comics were built on a variety of ideas, but the one that caught a lot of attention (aside from the obvious social stigma/minority verisimilitude) was the thought that these characters had to train themselves in the use of their powers. This was unique in comics, aside from naturally Batman, in the sense that most super-heroes instinctively knew how to use their powers. The idea that they would need training, along with their youth, emphasized the need for a school for gifted youngsters. A school that we are bringing back…with Academy X.

After the fallout, Emma Frost decides that training is essential to the development of mutants everywhere. The idea of fighting a war, along with her past failure with the Hellions, has soured her relationship with Scott. They may love each other, but their missions are quite different. Emma realizes the need to train any and all mutants on how not only to safely use their powers, but live in society as well. On this mission, she recruits many X-Men to help along with former students of the X that want to give back to the community. Integration might seem like Josh and I want to homogenize the mutants population, but that would be a disservice to the idea that, while mutants are a minority and man minorities identify with X-Men lore, they are also potentially dangerous. Equal rights are a great and necessary thing for everyone, but you also have to realize that there is a good reason to fear mutants (or any super), especially if they can’t control their powers.

Emma Frost leads the charge to rebuild the Xavier Institute and call it Academy X. This place is a haven from the fighting that occurs with the mutants all across the globe. A safe place to learn to use their powers, and after they graduate, they can decide what to do with their education. The school offers basic education and college equivalence courses along with dorm space for over 60 students. Emma still feels the guilt over the Hellions, but this isn’t her major reason for forming this school. This is a proactive way of making sure mutants do not have a “Stanford” incident that precipitated Marvel’s Civil War. The students MUST be able to protect themselves, and control themselves.

Emma is not alone though as she has recruited a top tier staff. Storm, still married to the Black Panther, shares Emma’s drive to insure that the mistakes of yesterday do not impact the children of the atom. She also is naturally distrustful of Emma, and sees herself as a counter-balance to her more ruthless tendencies. Using Wakanda’s resources, she also facilitates the rebuilding and expanding of the the school. Storm truly feels that no child should be left behind, recalling her own childhood as a refugee.

Joining her will be Colossus, a man of peace who was brought into war. Over the years Peter has been been scarred by the never-ending conflict and battles and finally decides that this was never his place. He might have been born with the powers of a warrior, but his heart is not built the same. Though he considered leaving, Storm convinced her little brother to stay and do what might be closer to his heart. Teach. Teach mutants control, and also teach them about grief and real perspective on the war against mutants, humans and their ilk. A place to guide other artists, and a place to finally heal his own soul.

Rounding out our alumni is the ever loving Beast. Hank may be doing covert actions with the Secret Avengers, but he jumps at the chance to come back to the institute and apply his voracious intellect and propensity for excessive discourse onto the student body. He had a falling out with the X-Men over the idea of X-Force and other decisions that Scott Summers (Cyclops) instituted, but he had to answer the call to be a teacher. His own unique isolation incurred his numerous transformations, and he might be able to fully identify with mutants that create more…monstrous manifestations.

Running a school is hardwork, and you are going to need a great staff to round out this collection of good guys. Forge alone will be creating numerous technical devices for the group, while still trying to get back with Ororo (Storm). Cecilia Reyes is back in the institute as resident doctor and teacher. Finally, the graduating class of the New Mutants, Moonstar, Karma, Doug Ramsey, Warlock, Magik, Cannonbal, Sunspot and others will join as the faculty that will not only train students with education, but how to survive the deadly reality of a world that hates and fears them.

What mutants will be in the enrolling class? Well two X-Men will be here to tell you. Angel and Iceman are the school recruiters, and if they knock on your door, your world is about to change. Half of the starting class will be established characters from the Marvel Universe, while the rest will be original creations by Josh and myself. I am sure you will remember characters like Blindfold, Dust, Gentle, Indra, Elixr and Pixie among others.

The school might be the focus, but don’ think that there won’t be action! Even with the CW like teen drama that might seem inherant to this sort of comic, the characters will be different, as will the antagonists. The Hellfire Club wants mutants to lead the future and to tempt the youngsters to use their powers for ill. Humans wish the mutants to be eradicated, and Mr.Sinister wants mutants around to fight against his former master. Gangs of Upstart mutants roam everywhere, whill they recruit students…or become students. The school offers a choice. Become a member of society, or join the war…but the decision is always yours. The school is about learning what to do with your gifts and helping you live in a world that fears, hates…but also wants to use you. Will you be a member of society, an Upstart or Brotherhood member…or an X-Man. This is the NEW school of the gifted, welcome to Academy X, we hope you survive the experience!

Posted by Nerd Boy Wonder 2 June Permalink

Pitch This!: X-Men Part 1

The X-Men reached their peak in the 90s and easily became Marvel Comic’s premiere media darling right alongside Spider-Man. The classic Kirby/Lee creation set forth a team of evolved humans facing social prejudice which in turn made them a tool for social commentary on the treatment of minorities in the United States. During the 90’s Jim Lee and Chris Clairemont had their glorious run with the characters that had them grow while dealing with new challenges from within and other wordly.

Today is a different story. With Distopia X, Second Coming, and mutants facing vampires the X-Men universe has put mutants in their own corner of the Marvel Universe and has had them take no part in any of the company wide crossovers except for Marvel whore Wolverine. The last time X-Men had overall success with the fans came with Joss Whedon handling the team on Astonishing X-Men and prior to that Grant Morrison’s critically renowned run on New X-Men. The problem was that current writers and editorial mandate have retconned many of the changes that many of the writers have made that allowed the characters to grow in order to return them to their “classic” form.

After numerous rants by Jeff and I regarding Marvel’s treatment of one of comic’s greatest franchises we decided to bring to you a Pitch This! that is bigger than our previous attempts. We’ve grown tired of the regression game that editors and writers have played with the mutants. It has hindered the potential of the characters and the franchise by having the characters in the same vicious story cycle they have been in since the 90’s.

It is time for a new direction that is in tune and consistent with the characters. The X-Men should not be their own nation as one of the primary themes of the franchises has always been the integration and treatment of the characters in society. Making them an endangered species is a novel idea but at the same time not consistent with the themes of the franchise. Mutants are the next step in human evolution. The sense of fear, power and change are heavy themes and have unlimited story potential. So now where do we begin…

After Second Coming mounting tensions between the newly formed mutant Nation and anti-mutant groups and nations worldwide have come to ahead. Amongst the mutant safe haven dividing idealogies split the recently united mutant nation. One side believing that mutants have a right to live on their own in peace, another believing instead of segregation of homosuperior and homosapien races that both should come to a resolution and learn to live together in peace, and one side believing mutantkind should show dominance over the “inferior” species through military force.

Cyclops, the leader of the mutant nation comes to a crossroad as he is unable to keep the now fractured nation together and Magneto under the banner of of nationalism gathers both human hating mutants and the prideful nation factions and creates a reckless chaotic mutant army. While Magneto and his new Brotherhood army ready to mount a full assault on any and all nations that threaten his regime Professor X reappears to the X-Men with an familiar threat on the horizon that threatens both humanity and mutantkind. Professor X warns that the Shadow King returns but he cannot defeat him alone and needs the X-Men’s help.

Magneto leads his forces in a full scale attack on a joint forces from all around the world. The battle raises the stakes as the Sentinel program re-emerges with newer Sentinels with the ability to adapt to abilities. The upgraded machines cut through Magneto’s forces. A X-Men team lead by Wolverine is caught in the middle between Magneto’s forces and the anti-mutant army. As Magneto sees his army become decimated and the X-Men become the target of the Sentinel attacks he redeems himself by destroying the Sentinel forces ending the conflict but at the price of his life.

Professor X and the remnants Xavier’s first class (Cyclops, Beast, Angel, and Iceman) confront the Shadow King in his attempt to enslave the world. The X-Men combat his physical form while Professor X attacks the Shadow King in the Astral Plane. With The fate of the world’s free will at hand Professor X sacrifices himself and destroys the Shadow King from existence.


With Magneto and Professor Xavier, the most influential leaders in mutant history gone and the mutant nation a failure mutant kind finds itself without a direction. Cyclops abandons the destroyed nation with guilt and sense of failure over his leadership. Mutants integrate back into society all over the world with mixed results. The X-Men return to the United States but due to the Heroic Age they, along with other mutants, receive a pardon. Seeing the recklessness of the young untrained mutants and the destruction of battle, Beast (serving on Steve Rogers Secret Avengers covertly), Emma Frost, Colossus, and Storm have given up the fight and instead reopen the Xavier Institute of Higher Learning in order to help mutants understand and control their abilities. Cyclops on the other hand is on a different path. He believes to take a pro-active approach to Xavier’s idea. By taking action and showing that mutants are on the side of justice Cyclops recruits a core group of mutants not only to redeem himself but redeem mutantkind by taking on threats to all forms of mankind.

With that said here are some teasers for the upcoming installments of Pitch This!: X-Men! Next week in part 2 we will introduce Academy X and the following week in part 3 we will finally reveal the remaining roster of our X-Men. Let your speculation begin!
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Posted by Nerd Boy Wonder 26 May Permalink

Reasons Why You Should See Iron Man 2 For Other Than ScarJo

Lets just get this out of the way. Ryan Reynolds is a lucky vampire killing, 4th wall breaking, cosmic ring wielding jerkface mcgee to be married to Scarlett Johansson. Best. Honeymoon. Ever. Oh yeah this is supposed to be about Iron Man 2.


Robert Downy Jr. returns to the suit, both designer and armor, in Iron Man 2, breathing life into the often dull comic character Tony Stark. This time around, Tony Stark faces self-destruction, the U.S. government, a rival military defense contractor, and death. Throughout the film, RD Jr.s portrayal of Tony Stark manages to capture the charming douchebag, but manage to make him sympathetic by bringing forth Tony Stark’s personal belief of a better tomorrow. The Marvel movie universe’s Tony Stark could give the comics’ Deadpool and Spider-Man a run for their money for the biggest smart ass award.


Mickey Rourke’s character, being a combination of Whiplash and Crimson Dynamo, is introduced immediately at the beginning of the film and completely sets the tone for the film. As Ivan Vanko, Rourke makes the character a legitimate threat and takes a rather dull and often leather clad dominatrix character into someone you should be fearful of. Physically, Rouke is intimidating but also shows off his range with the character’s tech savy that made the character not only a physical villain, but also a mastermind. My only complaint about the film would probably be about how the final confrontation between Crimson Dynamo/Whiplash and Iron Man felt forced and a bit of retread. It seemed like the same fight in the first film and there was no need to go back. Without going into spoilers, the mastermind angle they began to play with would have been better suited with a non-physical solution.



Rounding out the villains is Justin Hammer played by Sam Rockwell. While Tony Stark is the charming douchebag that can get away with anything, Justin Hammer felt like a cheap suited used car salesman. The thing is, it worked so well. Sam Rockwell had Justin Hammer be this slimy underhanded businessman. If Tony Stark is a sleek sexy iPod, Justin Hammer is a cheap MP3 only playing devices that has been dropped so many times that the backing is taped so the battery won’t fall out.

The film would not be as good without its supporting cast. Don Cheadle steps in for Terrance Howard as James Rhodes and also dons the War Machine armor. Cheadle is not really allowed to show off his acting chops in the film. He does not steal the show as War Machine, but he still manages to be a major bad ass either way. Speaking of asses…

Scarlett Johansson. She is complete eye candy. Her role as Black Widow in the film was much like the War Machine role. Not there to steal the show, but still present. It also helps that she will make the entire male audience think dirty, dirty things. As the Black Widow, she is there to set up the interconnected Marvel movie universe as well as the Avengers movie. If anything, they should get ScarJo to take up the role again for the Avengers movie. Part of the eye candy brigade, Gwenyth Paltrow returns as Pepper Potts with her role as the love interest intact. This time around though, the love story takes a back seat so it may seem her importance in the film was shortened. She still manages to successfully play Pepper Potts as the one that tries to reign in Tony Stark.

The film is cameo heavy. Garry Shandling as a U.S. senator are some of the most entertaining scenes in the film. Equally entertaining and fanboy heavy is Samuel L. Jackson as Nick Fury. It is not so much that Samuel L. Jackson is acting as Nick Fury. It’s more like Samuel L. Jackson is acting like Nick Fury acting like Samuel L. Jackson. It’s okay though. He can do that. He’s Samuel L. Jackson.



The film as a whole has two weak spots that can be looked over, but also could have been changed or expanded upon. The final physical encounter between Iron Man and Rourke’s character could have been resolved differently. As said before, it was a major retread from the first film. Superhero slugfests are cool, but not always necessary. The second would be the sudden daddy issues that sprung up mid-film. This is something that should have either been present from the first film or immediately introduced in the beginning of the film. It is nothing major but the whole daddy issue element to Tony Stark. It sort of just happened and was resolved rather quickly. Yes, that’s what she said.

All in all, the film is entertaining and quite possibly brings justice to a character better than the original source material. The sequel manages to maintain and continue the same rock star attitude the first film had. It is like the film was someone who walked into the room, knew it had the biggest dick there, and had no problems showing it off. Definitely go watch the film. With the amount of cameos, you and your friends can possibly make a drinking game out of it. Stay after the credits. You won’t be disappointed.

Posted by Nerd Boy Wonder 7 May Permalink

Clash of the Titans - Review

Consistent cinematography, exemplary believable acting, a strong cast, and dialog that makes Quentin Tarantino go back to his roots and restudy… These are all the things you WILL NOT find in this rendition of Clash of the Titans.
There is really no way around it, this film is a snore fest sponsored by Tylenol PM. The problem isn’t a lack of action; it’s a lack of great or even commendable execution. It’s a reel of mediocrity at its most mediocre. The film does have it’s moments but they are not nearly enough to bring this homage to the 1981 classic back from the depths of Hades.

So, what went wrong? Let us start with the cinematography. It doesn’t have a look that is by any means outstanding or captivating. At times it can be compared to watching ’ Xena: Warrior Princess‘, or ‘Hercules: The legendary Journey’ reruns on UPN. The cinematic inconsistencies take you out of the film more often than not. The heavens have a cool unique look, but are limited to one Olympian room, giving it a not so grand feel in the long run. It comes to a point where it just looks like a handful of Gods being cranky with each other in a studio apartment decorated with divinity and everything is glowing; on Mount Olympus, everything is glowey! It’s in the history books.

Earth is limited to Argos; as far as this film is concerned Argos is the only city in the entire world that matters. Because of this, the sense of grand adventure is lost. There is nothing special about the way Earth is portrayed. Man is dull and pale in comparison to the majestic beauty of the Gods. Though that may be true, it just does not convey well on the big screen. Watching the action sequences only to be brought back down to the story driven sequences, which move the film along, can be akin to watching an amalgamation of mismatched movies copy and pasted together. One moment you’re watching ‘The Scorpion King‘, a scene later it’s something in the style of ‘Legend of the Seeker‘.

The casting seems to fall victim to the same issue as the cinematography, capriciousness. No one but Hades (Ralph Finnies) and the computer generated monsters executed their roles in a believable manner. The cast of the film struggle to come off as warriors, and men and women of ancient Greece. Instead all we see are actors trying to be. Not being. There is a chemistry lost between the performers. The love, the hate, the lust- None of it comes off as plausible. Sam Worthington as the young vengeful  demi-god, Perseus, seemed to be about as far a stretch as the “Gomu no Bazooka” of Monkey D. Luffy (Google it!). His performance comes off as a stale emotional grind. Though it may not be completely possible to blame Sam for his performance, maybe more so the script. He never really had any moments to show off or explore his range, as an actor [in this film]. Zeus also did not come off as convincible. Liam Neeson as the King of Gods was far from outstanding in a normal sense of film. If this were a good movie with a strong cast, he would have fallen under the table. This could also be faulted to the casting director not giving the people what they believe they want. In our collective minds, Zeus farts thunder and defecates lightening. When he burps, typhoons of epic proportions form across the globe! Neeson’s performance just didn’t bring that to the screen. Yes, He kicked all the ass in the film “Taken”, but a God, that did not make him. It could be possible the costuming just didn’t bring that out in him, as well. Instead of looking like Zeus, ruler of the skies and heavens, he came off as Charlie, commander of that spot in front of Subway who only needs fifty more cents. The rest of the cast hit a wall of forgettable, apart from Gemma Arterton. Her role as Io, the ageless Pedophilic boy watching former priestess of Hera, wasn’t so forgettable, Not so much because of Liv Tyler like performance, but more because of the unique beauty she brings, and that thing they did with her at the end that could be seen coming from a mile away. Be ready to moan in agony.

What the Nerds of the world may find some kind of cool? At times the film does come off like an RPG adventure. Random encounters, setting out on an adventure, finding anomalous & powerful new weapons, and new party members with incomparable sets of talents.

Clash of the Titans fails to bring you to a point of caring for any of the characters involved in the story. It has moments where it is trying way too hard to be funny. It works out about as well as that friend you have with horrible timing and swears he’s funny, but in the end no one is laughs except that friend. If you don’t know who that friend is, it is probably you. The CG isn’t horrible, but it isn’t great, and it is also inconsistent. The music score is subpar. It lacks that defining tune you hear through out the film that pulls you back in to the universe. The music comes off as an afterthought. It feels as it is there because it has to be. It may have been better if they just revisited different forms of the song they used in the trailer, “The Bird and the Worm” by the Used. Faulty pacing, and scenery that feels compressed and stuffy, a shoddy script; Clash of the Titans is one you should skip on your box office trip as it is whole heartedly nondescript. Did you see what was done there? :)

Posted by Nerd Boy Wonder 3 April Permalink

The LV. Cap: Heavy Rain Review

By Roger Gaw
Heavy Rain was made to blur the line between movies and video games. The player will take control of 4 different characters and the choices made will decide who lives and who dies. The developers coined the phrase “Interactive Drama.” Read on to see whether the games lives up to the hype and treads into cinematic territory.


Heavy Rain
Playstation 3
1 Player Story Mode
Developer: Quantic Dream
Publisher: Sony Computer Entertainment
ESRB Rating: Rated M for Mature
Price $59.99

Pros:
Effort: This game tries what many other games do not and I have to respect that. It does a lot of things very well but it also does a lot of things sub-par. Certain decisions can affect the life of each of the 4 characters but some decisions really don’t matter that much. I give Quantic Dream credit for trying new things in terms of video games.

Dark Story: Normally video games stories never tread into these waters. The story does shock at certain points with the choices given to the player and the twists of the plot itself. That being said, movies have done it before, and they have executed it much better.


Cons:
Controls: You don’t physically control the character very much in the game but when you do get to take control, it’s atrocious. I have never played a game with worse character control than this. Moving the character from point A to point B was either underdeveloped because the developers didn’t care or they didn’t realize how important good controls are even for “Interactive Drama.” Navigating through a crowd of people is one of the most frustrating things I have ever experienced. You only get 2 camera angles and most of the time neither one was very good. Also some of the time the character would walk in the exact opposite direction I was moving the analog stick.

Voice Acting: It’s bad. It’s really bad. This is one of the major detractors from the story. It’s really hard as an audience member to buy the emotion of this story with no emotion coming from the characters in the story.

Graphics: Some of the time the graphics really please me, but most of the time I was noticing the lackluster. Most evident were the corded phones with cords and the corded power tools with cords. I can not see how those things got past by the developers. Also during the cutscenes the character movement is very awkward.



Verdict: This game tries to succeed as a game and a movie and it’s really disappointing as both. It’s plagued by horrible voice acting and terrible gameplay mechanics. I think most people who found this game favorable either got caught up in the hype or just have very low expectations for a story and a game. That being said perhaps someone can build on what the game ATTEMPTED to do. The attempts to set video game precedent and that is it’s only saving grace. I suggest renting the game if you have to play it but most of you will not find it enjoyable.

Posted by Nerd Boy Wonder 25 February Permalink

Comic Book Splash!: Print Advertisement

By Amra “Flitz” Ricketts
Imagine if you will, A world where Super-heroes actually exist. A world where these meta’s reach celebrity status. Their images grace our magazines, televisions, and billboards… [Though they already do that]. Some heroes endorse products we all know so well, others have products all their own. Can you imagine a world like that? If you have a difficult time grasping this concept throw your concerns of your shoddy skill of mental conception to the wind- Strap your self in and enjoy a stint in the world of Super-hero endorsement and advertisement. This is Comic Book Splash: Print Advertisement.


Let’s start off with one of the worlds most powerful corporations and two of the comics most powerful beings. The slogan is the topper with a very “Nuff said” feel. There are three more heroes I wanted to add; The Sentry, Invincible, and American (from the comic book “Cla$$ war”. In the end I decided to keep the image simple like Google’s page lay-out and the slogan I chose to tack on.

I have a thing for history and if the Marvel’s civil war event wasn’t historic enough, pitting a beloved American hero against a drunken billionaire, right at the end writer Ed Brubaker decided to off Captain America. Those Crafty Russians finally created their own anti-super-soldier serum; it just needed to go through the wright persons blood stream. GJ Stark!


Anyone else ever wonder how Sinestro’s banana worshiping corn cob eating lemon fresh spraying staring in to the sun butter spreading ass keeps his Mustachio so damn fresh? The answer lies in a wax in a lil’ ol’ tin.


I’d drink it. We all need a little piece of Galactus inside of us, right? There would also be a black cherry-grape flavor called “Fill the Void”. This is great marketing, people!


What kind of dog food would Krpyto the super dog eat? Honestly he could eat whatever he wanted to. Though his owner, Superman, would probably go for something a long the lines of a Raw diet I.E. Primal, or Stella and Chewy’s, but Kryptos super digestive track could handle all the bad by-product and corn in Purina products.

There is really nothing I can say to make this anymore bad ass. This pic was posted on /co/ and I got a vision in my head to make it even more awesome;  it is actually what inspired me to start Comic Book Splash. FUCK YEAH!


Honestly this one was a toss up between Peter Parker and Olsen. Olsen has live an amazing life for a mere human and won him self a Pulitzer prize. It’s amazing the ginger was never kill off ( that I can remember). Honestly the boy should be rich, a sponsorship and endorsment contract from Olympus should get him there.


Nerds around the world would love to get in to this green babes jeans. She is hot and amazonian like… keep this in mind, She has slept with The Juggernaut and the Asgradian Demi-God, Hercules, during these copulation sessions they left the room in shambles. Do you really think you could handle DAT ASS? I don’t think so. leave the green vagoo handling to the super strengthened big boys.


Logically speaking any shoe the Flash wears would decenter-grate under the speed of  a man who can move faster than the speed of light.  Those yellow rain boots just wouldn’t cut it. I’d imagine in the real world one of the worlds top sneaker companies could team up with one of the worlds top tire companies and come up with a solution. The result, The Flash and the whole Flash family’s feet would be decked out in Adidas-Goodyear Gear. Honestly if they did this in actually reality, I would rock the hell out of  those shows. Who cares if I looked like I were walking in hollowed out smiley-face corpses- lolwat???


In Philly and the South New Jersey area’s we have a place that is opened in the spring and summer seasons called “Rita’s”. In this world the Rita’s chain was hostilely  taken over by the likes of Captain Cold, Icicle, and Mr. Freeze. They renamed the chain to Villain’s took the business national and began to make major bank. They put any competition out of business with aggressive fear tactics, it is also how their  clientele numbers continue to grow. With a balls out gung-ho street team they will only continue to grow with their tasty cold treats which can be bought at reasonable affordable prices. They soon change the logo and come up with a friendlier Villain’s mascot. His name is “Brain Freeze”.


THE END OF THE BEGINNING!

Posted by Nerd Boy Wonder 3 February Permalink

Top 10 Most Badass Bad Guys

By Roger Gaw
There have been some despicable character’s in film. I mean downright nasty bastards with no morals or conscience at all. Well here is my list of the best of the bad. If you think I missed one or you think I’m wrong post in the comments below. Just know that I’m still always right and you’re always wrong.

#10- Michael Myers: Halloween(1978) may in fact be my favorite movie of all time. It is definitely my favorite horror movie. Michael Myers was the first unstoppable killing machine to grace the silver screen. Without Michael, there would probably be no Jason or Freddy. Some of you will say Psycho or The Texas Chainsaw Massacre was the first “slasher” movie but Michael was different. Michael was more than just a mere murderer. He was more than just human. He had the blackest eyes. The Devil’s eyes.



#9- Vic Vega aka Mr. Blonde from Reservoir Dogs: Most of you probably didn’t even know his name or that he is in fact the brother of Vincent Vega from Pulp Fiction. What you did know is that he was a complete psychopath. Every time I hear Stuck in the Middle, I remember the torture scene with the cop. The guy cuts the cop’s ear off and then mocks him by talking into the severed body part. But he’s not done there. Oh no. He pours gasoline over the open wound and just as he was about to set him alight, he gets shot. Probably nobody would have died if it weren’t for Mr. Blonde’s actions during the heist but instead, everyone dies.



#8- Hans Gruber from Die Hard: Considering some of the people on this list, Hans might not be so evil but I just generally don’t like him for some reason. It might be his smug attitude or accent. It might be his cheesy smile. But whatever the reason, people everywhere remember him and his death. Yippie Ky Ay motherf*cker.


#7- Max Cady from Cape Fear(1991): This is the worst kind of psychopath, an educated psychopath. Robert Deniro educates himself in prison after a rape conviction and learns that he was purposely represented poorly by his lawyer, Sam Bowden. He then spends the rest of the movie exacting his revenge. He kills the family dog. He rapes and assaults one of Sam’s co-workers. He even almost seduces Sam’s daughter. Max traps the family on a boat and is about to rape Sam’s daughter and wife as he is set ablaze. That doesn’t stop Max, though. He traps Sam and exacts his own trial on him. Eventually, the two fight with Max being handcuffed to the sinking boat.



#6- Norman “Stan” Stansfield from Leon The Professional: Gary Oldman plays a great bad guy. This is my favorite of all his characters. As a corrupt DEA agent, he murders a little girl’s entire family including her 6 year old brother and becomes hellbent on murdering her as well. He is a law enforcement agent who uses drugs and kills kids.



#5- John Doe from SE7EN: This is another one of those educated psychopaths. John bases his victims upon the seven deadly sins. John force feeds an obese man spaghetti so much that he is able to kick the man in the stomach and cause it to explode. At gunpoint, he forces a lawyer to cut off a pound of his own flesh to atone for his greed. He ties a man to a bed for a year but keeps him barely alive to account for sloth. He forces a man to rape a prostitute with a dildo fitted with a blade to account for lust. He cuts off a model’s nose and gives her the option of living with the scars or suicide. To cap things off, he envies his investigator’s wife so he tries to “play husband” with her but she refuses. To atone for his own sin of envy he cuts off her head and has it sent to where he and the investigator are. Thus provoking the investigator to wrath and killing him. So in the end, the bad guy won in this film. All seven sins were accounted for.



#4- Scorpio Killer from Dirty Harry: I have never hated a character more than I have hated this bastard. And my good friend, Clint Eastwood, feels exactly the same. He is a murderer and a rapist. He rapes a teenage girl and then buries her alive. All the while, the justice system at the time makes him seemingly untouchable. His face just makes you want to hit him with a nail riddled 2x4. The actor did such a good job portraying the killer that he actually received death threats following the movie. But in the end, the punk just wasn’t “lucky.”



#3- The Joker from The Dark Knight: Heath Ledger’s portrayal of the maniacal Joker is simply one of the best performances in the history of cinema. The Joker is by far the most insane person this list. Ledger described his character as a “psychopathic, mass murdering, schizophrenic clown with zero empathy.” And in this movie, that’s exactly what comes across. He has no compassion. He kills for fun and laughs while he does it. He forces Batman to choose between saving the love of his life or by saving the face of Gotham’s new hero, Harvey Dent. The choice backfires on Batman and further causes conflict. It’s really hard for words to describe this performance. This is just one of those movies you have to see.



#2- Hannibal Lecter: Hannibal is the most intelligent psychopath in the history of cinema. The Silence of the Lambs is one of the greatest movies I’ve seen. And although he was on screen for only sixteen minutes during the entire film, Anthony Hopkins won the Academy Award for Best Actor. He is the epitome of absolute evil in every way. Sometimes, he doesn’t even have to use his own hands to murder someone. He can just talk you into killing yourself. He not only feeds a man his own brain, but feeds the brain to a child. Twice. That is what makes him so bad. It’s the evil corrupting the innocent.



#1- The Bad from The Good, the Bad and the Ugly: His f***ing name is The Bad. How could I not make him number one? Actually, they call him Angel Eyes in the movie but that doesn’t take away from his badass badness. Lee Van Cleef was frequently typecast in westerns as the villain because of his cowling face and he portrayed them wonderfully. As The Bad, he beats women. He murders for money and for fun. He beats prisoners of war and he is just downright rotten to core until the very end. Did I mention he killed a child? He helped make The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly into the greatest western of all time and the greatest man movie of all time.

Posted by Nerd Boy Wonder 28 January Permalink

Pitch This!: Aquaman

Aside from perhaps Martian Manhunter, Aquaman is quite possibly the most maligned member of the big 7 Justice League. The reason being has been given many a time, his power set, his costume, his personality. The truth is there is never a bad character, just writers who cannot make that character exciting. Jeff and I are done with hearing “Aquaman sucks.” It’s time we made him as epic as Superman and Batman. So, we give you Pitch This: Aquaman. The incestual Wonder Twins have more street cred compared to Aquaman. Not only do we want to make Aquaman viable to today’s readers but also create a franchise that the character deserves. We work him how DC recently did Hal Jordan. Restructure his comic series, then a direct to DVD animated feature and then maybe, a live action movie. Why in that order? Because the comics need to have a streamlined origin and characters so people can easily, pardon the pun, dive into the ocean of awesome that is Aquaman.

Lets start with the fact that Aquaman is not Namor, Marvel’s Sub-Mariner. He is his own person, a man of two worlds. He was raised by humans, but is quite proud of his Atlantean heritage. Arthur has an innate honor and nobility that are key to him one day being almost an ambassador between Atlantis and the surface world. Sure, he can sometimes be arrogant, but he does love both races. His arrogance comes from being also a bit of an outsider to both races. Humans see him as an alien, Atlanteans see him as their personal anti-Christ. His arrogance is pure frustration that two species that he loves cannot get along. It’s the frustration some outsiders have to the Middle East. If you want realism with a dash of fantasy, that’s your parallel.

The primary power that he gets ridiculed for in pop culture and amongst fanboys is the “ability to talk to fish.” The ability is much more than this. In fact, the ability is telepathy with all aquatic life. That means mind control, empathy, memory access, and communication with all aquatic life. That’s all sea life, but mostly the animals, Atlanteans, even an affinity to plant life. He can survive to the deepest depths of the ocean, therefore he is plenty strong and invulnerable. Finally, lets talk about how he works on the surface. Arthur is quite literally adept at breathing air as water, as both worlds are his home. Nuff said.

Briefly, lets talk about Atlantis. Atlantis has always been somewhat alien and unrelatable to the reader. In order to create some sort of relatability, the magic system of Atlantis has been lost to science except for a select few priests and those that can delve into the background. True magic is lost in Atlantis but much of the old ways are a basis of religion. Atlantis is a modern society, but the look is distinctly underwater. Everything is in bright colors and their main source of energy is the magma of the Earth.

How exactly do you reconstruct the franchise? Following Geoff John’s suit, I suggest launching a Rebirth and Secret Origins mini-series. Lets start with the beginning. Secret Origins would reintroduce the reader to Aquaman as well as clear up any continuity issues that would arise with the relaunch. Aquaman is one of DC Comic’s bigger characters that no one would really care for if there were changes in his origin as long as the story was good. Secret Origins would simplify and retell Aquaman’s origin in a 5 issue run. Themes that would need to be explored? His connection to the surface world as well as Atlantean heritage, his surface world life, his rise to power in Atlantis, and his introduction as a superhero to the DC Universe.

This brings us to Aquaman Rebirth. A 5 issue mini-series that would bring back Aquaman from the dead. Many may know now that Aquaman appeared as a Black Lantern in Blackest Night and raised a bunch of undead sharks to wipe out Atlantean military forces. Rebirth would take place after Blackest Night with the fallen King resurrected. What has happen to Atlantis since the King has been gone? Who has come to the kingdom in his image claiming to be the fallen king? Rebirth would show not only Aquaman’s place in the DC Universe but where Atlantis fits into the larger universe. What would Rebirth build that would allow a relaunch of a full fledged title? Political and religious themes galore.

What exactly what a full fledged Aquaman title do for the character? Solidify his importance to DC Comics. The first arc would have to pick up right where Rebirth left off. Following the first arc, reintroducing Aquaman’s rogues gallery as well as building newer threats that are essential to the character. Taking him on a Batman: Hush style story arc that would pit him against foes and team him up with friends. Re-establishing Aquaman’s place in the DC Universe is key to creating a franchise that would allow TV and movie spin offs.

Aquaman is a character that is far from being lame. Often tied down by fantasy lore and magic if often makes most newer comic readers and even regulars shy away. Modernizing Atlantis, creating a real society with parallels to our own, political and religious themes wrapped up in a superhero world would get Aquaman passed the “Superfriends” phase. What do you guys think? Would you read Aquaman now? Still think he sucks? Let us know! By the way, Jeff and I have Aquaman Secret Origins and Rebirth all plotted out. If you guys are interested in reading that, let us know!

Posted by Nerd Boy Wonder 25 January Permalink

Femininity in Gaming

By Alyx Asakawa
As a companion to last week’s “Masculinity in Gaming,” I bring you a brief overview of femininity in nerd culture!

Most video games feature one of two types of characters: either a customizable avatar, or an idealized persona. In the case of customizable avatars, most games will feature the option to change genders. Many gamers will choose to make personas reflecting their own physical appearance, potentially allowing women to immerse their own likenesses into the amazing worlds of gaming.
 
On the other hand, we have the idealized persona. As previously noted, many of gaming’s most iconic figures are hyper-masculine men. However, we also see strong women in Claire Redfield and Jill Valentine (Resident Evil), Samus Aran (Metroid), Zelda (The Legend of Zelda), Bastila (Knights of the Old Republic), Yuna (Final Fantasy X), Lara Croft (Tomb Raider), and so on. While many of these characters may be sexualized in an effort to still appeal to men, who still represent the majority of gamers, the fact remains that all of these characters are strong in their own right. They are more than men’s objects of desire, they are ideals for women as well. Most of them exhibit universally positive traits such as strength, intelligence, resourcefulness, and strong will, while retaining beauty and femininity.
 
These strong female characters are emerging proportionately to the rising amount of female gamers to enjoy them. However, we have been seeing strong women (and not just the ass-kicking type) in more universal media, like movies, for decades. This is simply due to the presence of the female audience who needed to be appeased.
 
But why is it that these are our empowered women? We must first face the fact that nearly any leading video game character, male or female, is going to be somehow over the top. Any leading character is ultimately an extension of our desires to be greater than we are. Quite simply, there isn’t much of a market for average characters because we already know what it is to be average. Some may say that the blatant sexuality of many female characters is to be considered degrading, but many women feel that one large aspect of a woman’s power is the control she has over her own sexuality. Of course some of those skimpy little outfits may be a been obscene, but there are men to be appealed to as well!
 
 
I believe most women can find aspects of themselves embodied in modern female game characters. From Zelda’s wisdom and elegance to The Boss’ influential nature and ass-kicking abilities, exaggerated though they may be, these are all pieces of ourselves that we can relate to. An ever-increasing number of women feel that the traditional image of femininity - a silent and servile little wife - to be more degrading than any outfit of Lara Croft’s. Girl gamers gravitate to these characters because they can actually see themselves within them. I don’t know about you, but I find it hard to picture myself in the role of Kratos, and yet one of the best aspects of gaming is the immersion factor.

The traditional muscle-bound, gun-toting man is still all well and good for a character, but sometimes I, as a woman, just want to put myself into Yuna’s little shoes. As video games hit the mainstream market more and more, expect to see more of these bombshell girls gracing your screens.

Posted by Nerd Boy Wonder 28 December Permalink

Pitch This!: The Avengers

Pitch This! is a new article that we are doing here on the site that enables the staff to display our fanboy desires and show off our creativity for our favorite franchises throughout nerd culture. In this inaugural column, Senior Staff Editor Jeff Adams and I are pitching our version of the comic book series The Avengers. The Avengers are a team that has to earn the title “Earth’s Mightiest Heroes” and they have to prove it. It doesn’t matter if the biggest threats whether cosmic or terrestrial with a group of individuals who embody the ideal of the best. The current comic are not about that, they are about realistic heroes who banter about their lives. They don’t fight the biggest threats, they fight villains that are more appropriate for the New Warriors or the X-Men. So who is part of our Avenger team?


The Roster:

Captain America - Steve Rogers: The Avenger who defines what the team is supposed to be at least in ideals, Steve Rogers is what superheroes look up to when they start out. He is the ultimate soldier, who doesn’t kill simply because he knows how people would follow that example. He is the exemplar of the field and the true tactical leader. His focus is bringing the team together again and managing the massive egos. Steve Rogers is a no brainer to be not only a member but a leader of our pitch of The Avengers because he is the defining symbol of the team as well as what a hero is in the Marvel Universe.

Iron Man: Tony Stark has been through his own personal hell and is now on his path of redemption. Though his relationship with Steve is strained, both want the opportunity to mend fences with each other and the world. Tony still feels a massive sense of responsibility for the actions that resulted in Cap’s death. Not only is he one part of the iconic Avengers trinity but, the financial backer of the current team.

Spider-Man: When Bendis brought one of his pet characters and one of Marvel’s iconic characters onto the team, I had many reservations. I am a long time Spider-Man fanboy and after I got over my own personal nerd rage, it donned on me. Spider-Man really does make a great Avenger. If you want to talk responsibility, Peter Parker knows it. His purpose on the team is two fold. He manages to make things lighter even when they are at their darkest. He is also the everyman of the team. If you want a street perspective, you talk to Peter Parker. Even with the “rape” of his continuity as of late Spider-Man is the epitome of the nerd turned hero archtype that many of us look to.

Wolverine: The most iconic mutant in popular culture. Not only does he define the X-Men but, Bendis put this ferocious fur ball on his Avengers team. It’s undeniable that Wolverine’s and Spidey’s interactions are magic. In our take on the Avengers though, Logan would have to do the one thing Marvel editors and X-Men fanboys would hate… leave the X-Men. Don’t get me wrong, the idea seems ridiculous at first but hear us out. Logan leaves the X-Men to do what he never thought he would want to do. Be responsible for the public image of the mutant race. Though Cyclops is leading the X-Men, it’s Wolverine that people have the hardest time feeling as a hero. He has tried to kill so many, so being on the premiere team is a way to mend fences, help his own kind and help the dream he has fought for. Cap sees Logan as the ultimate special forces character.

Hawkeye - Kate Bishop: Young Avengers was one of the most entertaining books put out by Marvel within the last few years but let’s face it. The long hiatus not only hurt the potential of these characters but, left them in limbo. This is why Jeff and I believe the untapped potential of those characters would be ripe for our incarnation of The Avengers. More specifically, Kate Bishop would fit perfectly on the team as the new Hawkeye. Given the name by Captain America, Kate has proved herself a worthy successor of Clint and now wants to prove that she can make it on a team filled with Clint’s mentor, Steve. Steve is reluctant to have her on the team because he is adamant against the idea of young heroes but he can’t fault her loyalty or her desire to truly be a part of the world’s mightiest heroes.

Moondragon: Believed to have died during the Annihilation War, Heather Douglas survived. Her energies manifesting back in her birthplace on Earth. Her teachings from the Eternals had prepared her for death. She is ideal for the team as she was once an Avenger, is practically a blank slate for new readers, and can tie the team to cosmic level threats. While the fun and smart ass antics of Spidey and Wolverine light up the team, her ego and bitchiness provides another monkey wrench into the team dynamic.

Songbird: She has been a rogue, a member of the Thunderbolts, reformed herself and now wants to be the hero she feels she is meant to be. Though the road has been rough, Songbird follows the path of many former Avengers going from rogue to hero. She feels a bit out of place on the team filled with living legends and people she has fought. Her powers truly set her apart and her longing for redemption mirrors the need of the team.

Every hero needs great villains to make make them look great. Here are a few choices Jeff and I feel that would define this team of Avengers…

The Villains:
MODOK: A giant head with stub appendages sitting in a floating chair. One word. Awesome. Not only does this villain look ridiculous but he has a whole scientific based terrorist organization at his command. Perfect for a sci-fi heavy post 9/11 military action.

U-Foes: An evil version of the Fantastic Four? Check! Treated as lackeys for A-list villains? Check! A need for a reinvention? Check! A C-list villain team wanting to make a name for themselves and join the big leagues.

The Stark: An obscure alien race built around the technology of Tony Stark? What happens if they search for their “creator?” Militaristic in nature what happens when they find out that their “creator” is just a man?

Kang: The ultimate Avengers villain. A time traveling mastermind that regardless of what he does to change the past, present, or future the Avengers always win. Kang is tired of losing. He won’t only want revenge, he wants to win.

Now that you’ve seen our idea of who should be on The Avengers, what do you guys think? Agree, disagree, or opinion? Let us know below!

Posted by Nerd Boy Wonder 22 December Permalink